In the 1960’s the average family had just one television with basically three channels. The family spent less time watching television but would typically gather together to watch a favorite program.
Today you have many more channels and it is not unusual for families to have more than one television, even enough for each family member to choose his or her own show to watch at any time. Television is only one example of the many choices available to customize your environment to suit yourself.
The ability to customize your environment can be a threat to togetherness with your partner. You can separate yourself from your partner through each choosing a separate lifestyle.
Now think back to when you were dating. Recall how time spent together was valuable, even if it was simply watching television together. So what has changed? Now you place a higher priority on pleasing yourself at the expense of the relationship. You treat the relationship as a given in your life which does not need to be nurtured as it was when you were first bonding and letting your partner know you wanted a future together.
Yet the reality is that a relationship that isn’t nurtured will die a slow death. Eventually, you will wake up realizing that you and your partner are living parallel lives – together but apart.
Instead of thinking about creating a weekly or monthly date with your partner, begin to think about each day as a potential time for a date. Even if you have just 30 minutes to spend together, consider how you can spend that time together. Compromise your individual desires to nurture time together.
1 comment:
My girlfriend is a big watcher of these "talent shows" lke American Idol and The Voice. The shows are genius at some level because they have a hook to make the viewer keep coming back week in and week out. They also are genius in that they come on back-to-back nights each week, with the second night being the "results show".
Given the addictive aspect of the shows, they take time away from the limited amount of interaction I have with my girlfriend anyway. I think it is incredibly disruptive and she sees my objections to her watching these shows virtually every single night as an annoyance (I would guess she would see it that way since my not liking her watching them may steal some of the viewing joy away).
I am convinced that over time this is going to harm oour relationship, as she seems to value watching those shows over the relationship. It wouldn't be a big deal if we lived in the same place, but we live about an hour apart and only see each other on the weekends. These shows are robbing us of time I think is important for us to interact.
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